another one

this is my 4th blog i think. the first 2 were rubbish..and i just grew out of the 3rd one. i have days when i keep blogging. then there'll be a lonnnng stretch of time where i wont write anything. it comes in waves i guess. so i keep deleting my blogs. but i need to write. its therapeutic to me. sometimes i think to much and i dont want to bother anyone with my thoughts. especially at night. before going to bed, its amazing how fast my brain can work at that time.



also, i can practice my spelling here. its much better now i think. =)



i'll be entering my 2nd medical sem on monday. Alhamdullilah..times flies really really fast here. maybe its because evrythings kinda like routine already. its stressful. but enjoyable at the same time. its enjoyable stress..that a word? everyone is sleep deprived. and the stress makes me wake up in the middle of the night every 2 hours. so i get my quality sleep during the weekends. agak melampau the quality sometimes. =p



we've entered 2008! 2007 was a real blessing.one of the best years of my life. hopefully 2008 can top that. insyaAllah.



missing home. as usual. JB is to far to go home on weekends or 4 day breaks. i've come to the age where i value family more than anything. now only my mother sees me as adult enough to tell me certain things which shock me. things she kept from us before this. things she had to go through to make ends meet. to make us happy. the sacrifices. so now everytime i go home, i stay home. i rarely go out anymore with my friends in jb. i'd rather sit with my mother and just talk or watch the discovery channel with her.



i cant wait to have kids. but its really really hard to raise children. what with the world becoming uglier by the minute. it scares me to think of what my kids might have to go through in the future. i see my friends who were raised in good homes. with good religious backgrounds ..lost when they mix around with the wrong crowd. so many of them drink now. the bf-gf issues are too extended to be discussed here. they somehow think they're married. hmm..



i see these things going on around me all the time. most of them going on with my close frens. i know i need to do something. most of the time i feel helpless. like i cant really make a difference. then i realize that im making excuses for myself. alasans .